Thursday, April 23, 2009


All right, so it's the PMDD (Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder) that has had me in the funk I've been in the past week or so. Now that my period has begun I am crampy, but much more functional.

The good: M is working. It's just contract work at the moment, but he has a couple other projects in the works as well, so maybe our financial outlook isn't as bleak as it had been. 

The bad: With his legal stuff still pending we are trying to figure out some way I can have a place to live if things go badly. The original plan was that I would stay with my grandfather (who had agreed to this arrangement) but with his death, well, my uncle has inherited his house. I was going to go talk to him and see if something could be worked out to allow us to stay there or maybe even buy the house from him. I was hopeful, got a little excited about it, but, as always when I get my hopes up, it all fell apart. My uncle has already promised the house to his step daughter. It's not like they owed me anything and I have no hard feeling about it, but I am so tired of being the one in the family who gets nothing. My mom is trying to see if there's any way we can buy a cheap house, and if I could figure out how to come up with about $20,000 then we could do that. But I am at a loss as to how to go about raising that much money. 

The ugly: Me. I am so grossly overweight and out of shape at this point that I don't even know where to begin with trying to fix it. But I need to. I'm trying to start back up with the yoga and hope soon to get my stamina up enough to make it through the whole hour program. My diet is still improving, I've cut the cottage cheese out and am now having just grapefruit for breakfast. I need to give up the sweets and will try to do that next. I figure if I can give up meat (oh, fried chicken, how I miss you!) then the cookies and snack cakes can also be put aside without too much difficulty. 

I've been doing a lot of knitting and other crafty stuff in the past couple of weeks, which has kept me from being quite so unhappy. I've found that I really like doing cross stitch. I picked up a little floral still life thing on sale and it is so pretty. It takes a lot of attention to detail, but is also mindless, if that makes sense.  I want to do more, but I'm trying to hold off on this and wait until I finish this project before getting supplies for another. 

My birthday is Monday and our anniversary (4 years!) is the 1st. I told M last night that it would be his last reminder of those occasions. I know we can't really afford any gifts or anything, but I expect at least a "happy birthday" from him. We shall see.

Why is the kitchen always dirty? Even right after I clean it, it is dirty again. How does that happen?

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

New knitting projects

One of the things I got with the gift certificate I won in Crazy Aunt Purl's cat sweater knitting contest was a Noni Pattern. I finally made the purse and it is quite lovely, if not yet completely finished. The finishing is rigorous and I believe I've mentioned before it is not something I enjoy or excel at. I still need to install the zipper and anchor the stiffener/lining to the bottom. I got a little creative with the handle and added some beading. Oh, and it had to have pockets. I am very pleased with the way my pockets turned out. I followed the directions for the medium bag, bit this thing is enormous. I might make a much smaller one if I ever get the motivation to do all the maths. Anyway, here are a few pictures of the Noni Harlequin Pillbox Bag (#109):

I also just finished (yesterday) a Kitty Pi for Cat. She wanted nothing to do with it at first, but now she can occasionally be found napping in it, so I consider it a success. What, you want photos? Okay, here you go:

In other news, M. is sort of working now but we are still in dire financial straits. A severe depression has settled in over me and has my few friends concerned for my well being. I don't feel like getting into it now, but maybe tomorrow I'll catch y'all up on what's been going on with me. In the meantime, I hope everyone who reads this isn't having to go through anything like what I am going through. If you are depressed and you have any resources to allow it, please get help.